My client, Company XYZ, is too demanding.
Is it true?
Can I absolutely know that it is true?
How to I react, what happens, when I believe this thought?
I feel like a victim. I feel trapped. I feel rage. I feel tension in my throat. It is like I want to scream but can’t. My back feels tense. I get depressed. I want to avoid their phone calls. I imagine walking out of my job – dramatically quitting. I moan to other people in the office and resent myself for doing it, for looking unprofessional. I huff and puff, and swear under my breath in the office after being on the phone with them or receiving another demanding email.
I get really stressed. I imagine all of the other work that needs to be done and won’t now been done as it needs to be dropped in order to work on this client. I imagine other clients getting angry. I am so fearful of other clients getting angry that I imagine myself staying late and having to come in during my holiday to catch up. I imagine that the work they require will take more time than it does. I postpone it.
Who would you be without the thought ‘Company XYZ are too demanding’?
I would be free to let them be as demanding as they want. I would no longer be a victim. I would be more objective in deciding what is a reasonable and unreasonable request. I would state my needs better – be clear about the meetings that it is not necessary for me to be in. I would communicate with them better about my own needs. I would be more present when they call. I would be more professional.
I have a fear that I would be a doormat. That I would just let them ask for whatever they want and do it.
Turn around 1
Company XYZ are not too demanding.
- They are as demanding as they are, which is reality. When I fight with reality I loose, but only 100% of the time. Someone can make any request they like of me. It is up to me whether I choose how to respond to the request and whether to fulfill it.
- They pay more than any other client and are our most profitable client and so can justifiably ask for things.
- They want good results and believe that they deserve them.
Turn around 2
I am too demanding of myself
- I have very high expectations of myself. I put myself under pressure by expecting myself to meet their every demand.
- I don’t say no to Company XYZ. I tend to just jump to their every need.
- I don’t take into consideration what is doable in a non stressful way and time frame.
Turn around 3
I am too demanding of Company XYZ
- I am too demanding of Company XYZ wanting them to be different to the way that they are. I am not just accepting them the way that they are.
- I am too demanding of them, demanding love and approval from them. The reason I work so hard is to fulfill my demand for love, approval and appreciation.
If you can see any other turn arounds or can find real life examples that you would like to share please feel free to comment below. Thank you.
To find out more about Byron Katie and The Work visit: www.thework.com.